There’s a fine line between being open and oversharing.
Sharing too much can actually push people away and even damage your reputation.
Psychology suggests that some things are best kept private. And there’s a good reason for that.
In this article, we’ll dive into the 9 things you should always keep to yourself. I’m going to unravel why discretion isn’t just about keeping secrets, but about valuing your own personal space.
Let’s keep the suspense no more and delve right in.
1) Personal life details
You’ve heard it before – some things are better left unsaid.
In an era where oversharing is rampant, it’s important to remember that your personal life should remain exactly that – personal.
Psychology suggests that sharing too much can lead to vulnerability. It creates an opportunity for judgment and unsolicited advice, which can often lead to unwanted stress.
Sure, it’s nice to share happy news or vent about a bad day now and then. But constant sharing of personal details, be it your relationship status, family issues, or financial situation, can lead to an uncomfortable environment.
Bottom line? Keep your personal life details private. It’s not about being secretive, but about maintaining a healthy boundary between you and the world.
2) Future plans and goals
I’ve learned this the hard way.
A few years ago, I was very vocal about my plans to start my own business. I shared my dreams and goals with everyone who would listen – friends, family, even acquaintances.
But as time went on, I found that instead of support and encouragement, I was met with constant inquiries, unsolicited advice, and even doubt. The pressure to live up to those expectations was immense.
Psychology suggests that sharing your future plans and goals can actually decrease the likelihood of you achieving them. It creates a premature sense of completeness and lessens your motivation to work towards them.
Now, I keep my future plans to myself. I work on them quietly and share them only when they’ve materialized into something tangible. Trust me, it’s made a world of difference.
3) Your income
Money – it’s one of those topics that’s always been considered taboo in polite conversation.
But why is it that we’re so reluctant to talk about our earnings?
It’s not just about etiquette. It goes deeper than that. According to psychology, discussing your income can lead to feelings of comparison and inadequacy in both parties involved.
In fact, according to a study published in the Journal of Economic Psychology, those who compare their income to others’ are significantly less happy.
The bottom line is this – your income is your business. By keeping it private, you’re avoiding potential discord and promoting a healthier and more balanced social environment.
4) Medical history
Privacy and confidentiality are fundamental in maintaining trust in the medical world. But this extends beyond doctor-patient relationships.
Your medical history is intensely personal. Sharing it can make others uncomfortable, and leave you vulnerable to bias or judgment.
Moreover, revealing such intimate details can often lead to unsolicited advice or unnecessary worry from others.
While it’s important to share relevant health information with those who need to know, such as your doctor or close family, your medical history should largely remain your own private business.
5) Personal grievances
We all have our fair share of grievances and grudges. But airing them out in public seldom brings any good.
Voicing your complaints or grudges to others might offer momentary relief, but it can lead to a negative perception of you. It can make you appear resentful or hard to please, which could affect your personal and professional relationships.
Psychology suggests that instead of venting to others, a healthier alternative is to address your grievances directly with the person involved or seek guidance from a neutral professional, like a therapist or counselor.
After all, being seen as someone who is mature and handles conflicts well is far more beneficial than being seen as someone who holds grudges.
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6) Your good deeds
There’s a kind of joy in doing good deeds and acts of kindness that is deeply personal and rewarding. However, when we share these acts with others, it can sometimes dilute the purity of our intentions.
Psychology suggests that sharing your good deeds can inadvertently make others feel obligated to reciprocate or even lead them to question your motives.
Moreover, it’s worth noting the words of Mother Teresa who said, “Not all of us can do great things. But we can do small things with great love.”
In essence, the power of a good deed lies in its sincerity. And often, that sincerity is best preserved in privacy. Do good for the sake of doing good, not for recognition or applause.
7) Self-doubt and fears
I’ll admit, there have been moments when I’ve doubted my abilities or feared failure. It’s a part of being human.
However, sharing these feelings openly can sometimes have unintended consequences. It can invite unsolicited advice, judgment, or even allow others to exploit your vulnerabilities.
Psychology recommends using self-doubt and fears as a tool for self-growth. Instead of broadcasting them, confront them. Use them to push your boundaries and overcome challenges.
It’s okay to be vulnerable, but choose wisely whom you share your vulnerabilities with.
8) Relationship issues
Every relationship has its highs and lows. But when it comes to disagreements or conflicts with your partner, it’s best to keep them private.
Discussing your relationship problems with others can lead to biased advice, as people tend to take sides based on their personal experiences or loyalties. Moreover, it can also lead to unnecessary gossip and speculation.
Psychology suggests that the best way to resolve relationship issues is through open and honest communication with your partner.
When you’re tempted to share your relationship problems with others, remember: your relationship is between you and your partner, nobody else.
9) Your password and pin numbers
This might seem like an obvious one, but you’d be surprised how often this boundary is crossed.
Your passwords and pin numbers are keys to your personal and financial information. Disclosing them can lead to misuse or identity theft, causing you significant harm.
Psychology reminds us that trust is crucial in relationships. But it also teaches us that maintaining personal boundaries is equally important.
In a nutshell, keep your passwords and pin numbers private. It’s about security, but it’s also about setting boundaries for your personal space.